THE WEATHER CONVERSATION
I value deep conversations.
We seem to have a lot of connections these days. But not all of them go beyond the “weather conversation”. You know – that conversation about the one thing that we all share in common – the weather.
Some people actually love talking about the weather and in some places it is actually interesting. I spent a few years living in New Zealand in an area where farming was the main thing and the weather affected every day life. It was also changing all the time, in this context the weather conversation can be interesting.
Other times this conversation is basically foreplay. The first line of connection before getting to anything deeper. Business conversations start here, server conversations start here, even potential dating relationships can start here.
But what if we skipped the weather foreplay and just got down to the good stuff? Down to conversations about life, hope, loss, pain, faith, the world we live in. What if we just got to the topics that mean something deeper?
What if when we asked someone “how are you?” we meant it?
Yes most of the time this is just a basic cultural greeting by which we must engage. But what if we cared about the response and actually listened?
Maybe the problem is not about talking; what if the problem is really about listening? When did we stop listening to people. Maybe our culture moves so fast because we do not consider ourselves valuable unless we are busy, or we truly are busy just trying to keep our heads above water. Either way, it is time to engage people and listen.
HOW ARE YOU?
This question could change someones reality; if we actually listened.
I said “HELLO” to someone the other day and they responded with; “fine and you?!” Well I did not ask “how are you”, but thanks for not listening to me, “I’m fine. Have a nice day.”
COMMuNICATION.
CONNECTION
REALITY
BE REAL
Do not ask the question unless you are ready to listen. No need for formalities, if you you not want to engage, just say hello and be on with your day.
I attempt to live this way and have seen many different responses. Someone can tell when you genuinely ask “how are you.” They can hear it, see it, sense it, that you are desiring a real human connection. We all want and need real human connections in our day to day life.
Lately I have had a few conversations with some old friends that have been so life giving. Yes certain conversations / people can be life taking, do not let those people take to much of your time / life. But when you run into someone who is filled with LIFE, embrace the conversation.
So how are you? How is the weather?
There was a time in my life when I would ask people:
What are you passionate about???
The sad thing is, many of us struggle to answer that question.
Maybe the reality is that we need to be asking that question more.
Time to listen.
*this last image was font in the internet — if I had more time I would adjust it a little, but hey it is a good starting point at deeper conversations.
**getting todays blog out early… headed to a wedding this afternoon and do not want to come home and still have to get this out. Committing to a blog a day has been seriously a great discipline.
***workouts are still moving slow. Had some good time walking with the family today and the back is feel better. Pushups and more to commence soon.
****hope everyone is having a great weekend — if you have read this far I dare you to post a comment with an “unconventional” conversation question. Post here on the blog or on facebook. Cheers!!
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